Showing up is half the battle. The other half is reminding yourself EVERYDAY to DECIDE that you’re willing to show up again and again, sometimes moment by moment.
And there’s actually no battle after all. Only a re-conditioning, in the deepest ways imaginable.
Re-conditioning new EMPOWERING patterns and a KNOWING that you can have everything you’ve ever wanted. That you can create it, even from the future, that in many cases it’s already done. It’s your destiny.
To live in LIGHT, expansion, infinite abundance, love, POWER and divine pleasure. Really it’s who you are. It’s what we are here for. Truly.
Despite years and lifetimes and ancestral ties beyond time and space that have told you otherwise.
Today I tuned into so much deep learning and letting go, lifetimes of unexpressed sadness, anger and fear wrapped up in all the relationships I never showed up for in full integrity.
Radical honesty and the ACCEPTANCE that it naturally demands is not easy. It’s terrifying to be so vulnerable and really be willing to LOOK at the truth, and not just look but SPEAK IT and share it with the people who matter most.
Be willing to be rejected. This could very well be protection from something that’s not serving you, but you just can’t see it in this moment.
Be willing to not get what you want. But trust you’ll always get what you need. You are so guided and taken care of, especially when you are living in full integrity and TRUTH (no matter what).
I sometimes feel like a little child still in communicating how I really feel and tuning into what I really want – especially when it comes to intimate relationships and communicating with someone I care about.
Ultimately I can still feel so fearful. That I am not loved and most of all, that I really am all alone and no one will ever understand me in the way I truly crave to be understood.
I can revert to so many old patterns so quickly, even though I could easily suggest the “right way” too approach the same situation to seemingly anyone else.
If anything I can see how divinely I choose the perfect people to teach me the lessons I need right when my soul is ready to learn them. And I keep showing up the best I can to stand in full truth and integrity despite the discomfort and saying how I feel in some cases for the first time.
I am stretching. I am growing. I am healing deeply. I am releasing so many old, ancient patterns of lack, scarcity, dependency and abandonment as I stretch to embody truth, radiance, self-love and INTUITIVE knowing.
So much listening. So often when we think at first “I don’t know” – perhaps we are wanting the other person to choose for us, so it will feel safe to then decide what we want without the fear of being rejected. But we always know. We do. Start listening and TRUSTING that you deserve whatever it is you are truly desiring.
The more risks we take to communicate what we honestly desire and deep down inside CRAVE the more walls can come down that block us off from RECEIVING all the love that is ALWAYS available to us (from ourselves and others).
We are such INFINITE, multi-faceted, complex, beautiful, magical beings. Beyond grateful for the full spectrum of emotions I can experience in a day that feels like a lifetime. That I can remember to CHOOSE to be here, in this body, in this life.
That it is all so perfectly designed for the experience I am truly meant to be having at this exact moment. That every being in my path is truly a divine teacher. A mirror for my LOVE, brilliance and possibility.
So much compassion. We are all trying the best we possibly can with what we have. I’m love you, I see you, I forgive you.